proper update

[uberniftacular]

Yeah, I'm updating for real this time. Mostly because I have nothing else to do. Well, except English quotes and research...which I can do a little later. I got all the rest of my homework done today, finally. Yep, the backlog of journals are finished, as well as my chem that's due tomorrow.

I didn't go to school today. It was partially because I was "sick" (translation: incredibly exhausted), but mostly I just didn't feel like going. Conveniently, my dad was home sick today, so I just told him I wasn't feeling too good, so he let me stay home. At least I got to see Bry this morning. But yeah, I went back to bed, but I couldn't sleep at all because I was feeling so guilty for not going to school even though I wasn't really sick...I shouldn't have, I know. It's not like I really missed anything (besides a sociology quiz that I can do in 5 minutes tomorrow), and hell, I needed a day off. Besides, I wanted to rest up so I'm not sick on Saturday.

This has been such a long week, even though it's only Wednesday. Mostly I'm sick of crying...the last day I didn't cry was Saturday. And even then, I almost did, but that's because of the movie I was watching, not something real. Monday...I don't know if I even want to talk about that, except that I just...lost it. It was horrible...my mother wants me to see a counselor. I really don't see how that would help at all, since I can hardly talk to my friends about my problems, let alone some random person I've never met before. And then Tuesday...I definitely spent the whole day crying on and off. Except, surprisingly, when my car died. Somehow I was calm through that entire ordeal...probably because by that point I just didn't have any tears left to cry.

I suppose I owe people an explanation for yesterday's...rant-ish thing. I guess there isn't too much to say about it, except that someone very dear to me turned 18 quite recently, but all they're interested in doing with it is renting XXX-rated movies and being able to escape from school whenever they want to. That and picking up more hours at work so then they'll never be around anymore.

On a somewhat happier note, I finally got to see Phantom this weekend...Saturday. Brilliant movie. And then Sunday I went and bought the soundtrack, and that's the only thing I've been listening to since then. I'm very seriously considering reading the novel for my English book next marking period.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Trust me sometimes just telling a complete stranger everything is a WHOLE lot easier then teling a friend. A stranger (especially since that stranger is probably a professional) won't judge you, but telling a friend could effect your friendship with that person.I wish you good luck with everything, and I hope you feel better.

[belinconnu.livejournal.com]

sweety.. sometimes taking off school when you are exhausted is a good thing. IT gives your body time to recover from things like hospital visits so you don't get things like strep throat. Relax, enjoy life, wash your hands obsessively, drink fluids, and stay healthy.