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uberniftacularPolicemen grow from helmets in a single night.
When you leave the room, cooked spaghetti tries to wriggle back home to Italy.
Put a slice of ham in the DVD player. It will play a short film about pigs. A slice of cheese will play a short film about cows.
The can opener was invented 98 years before the can.
Lions carry barcode scanners. They run them over zebras to check how much they cost before they eat them.
Clowns melt at 85*F.
Mugs are just cups who've been to the gym.
They say no two snowflakes are the same, but who's ever checked? I'll give you a hundred dollars if you find me a matching pair.
Beware of guitars. A small hairy primate called a "warris" lives inside every one. They live on a diet of human fingers.
All wind is made by wind farms.
If you grab the edge of your chair and pull as hard as you can, you'll lift yourself into the air.
Two in every forty thousand cars leave the factory as "siamese cars." If they share an axle, they can never be separated.
A new sun goes over every day. There's a big pile of them on the other side of that hill. When they cool down, people cut them into blocks and that's where we get margarine from.
Most birds wear parachutes in case they suddenly forget how to fly.
Slugs are just snails who've been mugged by other snails.
Keep a chicken nugget in a shoe box, leave it some water and corn, and soon it will grow into a live chicken.
The statue of liberty switches hands when her torch arm gets tired. She only does it when no-one's looking. The next time should be in about twelve years.
Every June, Scotland is towed 1000 miles south so it can have a summer. Only 10% of people in Scotland know this.
Hamburgers in the wild live in desert colonies. They hide under rocky overhangs to avoid cooking themselves in the heat of the day.
When someone shaves off a beard it goes to beard heaven.
All balloons have a reflection of a window in them even when there is no window nearby.
People who wear scarves are just trying to hide the fact that they've got heads but no necks.
We didn't have i-pods when I was your age. So we all had 20 piece marching bands with 10,000 songs memorized.
If you spin round really fast and then stop, your face will skid round to the pack of your head.
Hope these made everyone smile.
When you leave the room, cooked spaghetti tries to wriggle back home to Italy.
Put a slice of ham in the DVD player. It will play a short film about pigs. A slice of cheese will play a short film about cows.
The can opener was invented 98 years before the can.
Lions carry barcode scanners. They run them over zebras to check how much they cost before they eat them.
Clowns melt at 85*F.
Mugs are just cups who've been to the gym.
They say no two snowflakes are the same, but who's ever checked? I'll give you a hundred dollars if you find me a matching pair.
Beware of guitars. A small hairy primate called a "warris" lives inside every one. They live on a diet of human fingers.
All wind is made by wind farms.
If you grab the edge of your chair and pull as hard as you can, you'll lift yourself into the air.
Two in every forty thousand cars leave the factory as "siamese cars." If they share an axle, they can never be separated.
A new sun goes over every day. There's a big pile of them on the other side of that hill. When they cool down, people cut them into blocks and that's where we get margarine from.
Most birds wear parachutes in case they suddenly forget how to fly.
Slugs are just snails who've been mugged by other snails.
Keep a chicken nugget in a shoe box, leave it some water and corn, and soon it will grow into a live chicken.
The statue of liberty switches hands when her torch arm gets tired. She only does it when no-one's looking. The next time should be in about twelve years.
Every June, Scotland is towed 1000 miles south so it can have a summer. Only 10% of people in Scotland know this.
Hamburgers in the wild live in desert colonies. They hide under rocky overhangs to avoid cooking themselves in the heat of the day.
When someone shaves off a beard it goes to beard heaven.
All balloons have a reflection of a window in them even when there is no window nearby.
People who wear scarves are just trying to hide the fact that they've got heads but no necks.
We didn't have i-pods when I was your age. So we all had 20 piece marching bands with 10,000 songs memorized.
If you spin round really fast and then stop, your face will skid round to the pack of your head.
Hope these made everyone smile.
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-09 05:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-09 05:49 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-10 07:02 pm (UTC)